you can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness

I'm about to use this post as a soap box for what's been going on with me, and how I've been feeling since this year began. So, if you were looking for an outfit idea or my suggestions on which beauty products you should snag avert your eyes. All others don't say I didn't warn you.


Since January I've been going thru some MAJOR growing pains. I knew back in December that there were certain things I had to change about myself in this upcoming year. Things that I was sick of sitting around bitching about, problems that weren't fixing themselves, and to be frank removing bullshit that wasn't necessary in my life. So far, 5 months in I think I've done a pretty decent job of cleaning house. 


-quit my job
-ended a major relationship
-cut out all toxic friendships


I might sound dramatic but it's really helped me to be a better and happy version of me. Up until this point I had just accepted a lot of what was going on in my life. I'm a selfless person and it tends to bite me back pretty hard if I'm not being mindful. I've gained a lot in shifting my priorities since January. 


-new jobs, yes ladies and gents jobs! I have a full time gig in an office working 9-5, and several freelance visual jobs around the city to keep my busy and paid
-mindy, sounds corny but that little puppy has made me 100% happier 
-strengthening old friendships


I really think removing all the junk has made room for more beneficial things. The only part of my former job that I was ever passionate about I still get to experience on a weekly basis. I love getting to be creative, and I'm really grateful that certain people have come to appreciate my style. Having another factor outside of myself to care for has done nothing but made me more responsible and aware of how I'm spending my time. The friendships that have lasted thru all the hogwash are so much more meaningful to me than the way I viewed them at the end of college. 


There's still some factors in my life that need work. 


-my living space
-settling my priorities


The living space I've got pretty much down. I know these are my last few months in South Boston. I'm sad about it, but also really ready to leave here. This was the first place I came after I graduated so I grew up a shitload here. I experienced some of the best and worst parts of my early 20's here so it does deserve some credit. I also know that I've outgrown the area. I'm just not the same girl who moved here 3 years ago. 


Which brings me to my final thought. I know this song is totally played out right now as its streaming all over kiss 108 as I write this. There's truly something to blasting Goyte's "Somebody I Use to Know." I've been getting out a lot of my tense thoughts and feelings to this song lately. I mean half makes me think this is great for every time I feel burnt out by someone or something, and the other half wonders maybe I'm just somebody that I use to know.